“ASK . . . and you shall receive!" ASK . and others will do
what you WANT!
Know why?
People are taught from earliest childhood to do what is ASKED of them.
This training to do or say what they are ASKED to do or say starts in the home as
soon as little children are first able to understand anything.
When the child begins to learn, he or she is expected-and I do mean
expected-to answer promptly and correctly a continuous bombardment of
questions.
The dialogue begins something like this:
Mother: "Who is this? Is it Mama"
Then the same routine is repeated for "Da-da."
So begins conditioning to responding favorably to what is ASKED and
it goes on through life. It progresses to such questions as:
Mother: "What does the little doggie say?"
Little child: "Bow! Wow!"
Mother: "And what does the pussy cat say?"
Little child: "Mee-ow!"
Later, more questions, always questions- ASKING for action or
information in the form of a favorable response and getting the response
wanted-or else!
"What is the name of the little girl next door?"
"What did you learn at Sunday School?"
"Where were you all afternoon?"
"When did you see the red bird?"
"How would you like to go on a picnic?"
"What do you want for lunch?"
"Will you please hand me your socks?"
"Will you pull your wagon off the driveway so Daddy can drive
in?"
Always more questions-always ASKING and always requiring a response.
Not just requesting a verbal reply, but increasingly requiring compliance.
Then comes school-consisting of at least half of the time being
taken up with required answers to what is ASKED by the teachers. If there were
no ASKING and answering, there would be no measurement of learning.
And unless there is a measurement of learning, there can be no
evaluation of teaching methods. The value of what is learned, establishes the
value of the teacher-not what the teacher knows, as certified by academic
degrees, but what the teacher implants into the mind and personality of each student.
While this ASKING is continuing day after day . . . month after month
. . . year after year . . . the result is mental (conscious and subconscious) conditioning- the “learned response" to complying with what is ASKED. It becomes
an unconscious habit-a way of life.
And after you graduate from school, you have not finished your training
in responding to ASKING. In fact, your mental conditioning to replying with a favorable
response to what is ASKED of you has just begun.
School's out!!! But then comes the business world. It's a world of bosses
. . . bosses . . . bosses. At first, everybody is your boss. Finally, if you
study this blog carefully, you may become president of a big corporation -and then
only the stockholders (perhaps 10,000 of them!) and your Board of Directors and
your company's customers and regulatory agencies of government will be your
bosses, along with an unlimited number of other people and organizations
whose authority may be question- able, but whose intentions of ASKING you to do
things are quite vocal! So, you always will have bosses and you might as well get
used to the boss-employee relationship.
In business, it is the boss' job to ASK you to do things. And it is
your job to do what you are ASKED to do.
That's how business is run and it applies to all levels of management
and employees.
You do what you are ASKED to do-and you do it promptly, courteously
and correctly--or you find yourself holding a pink termination slip!
The technique of succeeding in business has changed and you had better
study these next few facts carefully because if you haven't changed to meet the
new requirements of business leadership you are headed for the nearest trash
can.
No longer can anyone become a business leader by fighting his way
to the top. The days of ruthless battles for leadership are gone. And so are the
days when one could climb the ladder of Success by kissing the feet on the rung
of the ladder above and kicking the face of the fellow holding the rung of the
ladder just beneath.
No, you can no longer fight your way up to Success. You have to be
LIFTED up by your fellow men!
The Secret of Success today is making yourself EASIER TO LIFT!
To begin with, that means cooperating with everybody! It means responding
to what you are ASKED -and doing it courteously, promptly and efficiently. It means
doing more . . . more . . . more than you are ASKED to do! And it means doing
some ASKING yourself, such as ASKING management how you can make yourself very useful.
Note this well: One of the nation's business leaders says there is
only a four-word procedure for Success: "MAKE YOURSELF MORE USEFUL."
Business is a continuation of doing in response to being ASKED. For
example:
Executive: "Will you come in and take my dictation now, Miss Jones?"
"Miss Jones, will you tell Mr. Brown that I can see him
now?"
"Miss Jones, will you bring me the file on the Smith
case?"
"Miss Jones, will you get me Mr. Black on the phone?"
Miss Jones, will you do this, will you do that, will you come here,
will you go there? And all day long, day after day, Miss Jones and every employee
is being consciously and subconsciously conditioned to respond to being
ASKED-and to respond courteously, promptly and efficiently-or else.
Meanwhile the executives, at all levels, are equally being conditioned
to the benefits of doing what is ASKED-courteously, promptly and efficiently.
All executives have bosses-and when you reach the top you will find that the
public is your most demanding boss of all!
All of us, from early childhood throughout all our lives, are constantly,
continuously and irrevocably being taught and trained to do what is ASKED of
us, and the doing becomes a "conditioned response."
Frequently, we willingly do what is ASKED just as a matter of course
without giving it a serious thought.
Even if we do stop and seriously think about whether we should do
what is ASKED of us, the farces of a lifetime of teaching, training and conditioning
bear heavily upon our decision, urging us to comply.
To refuse to do what is ASKED of us is like trying to swim against
the tide. It is unnatural, difficult and often dangerous.
You can be sure that the person you ASK to do something for you or
to give you information already has had a lifetime of teaching, training and
conditioning which will strongly favor his (or her) doing it. So ASK!
And there are other powerful forces ready to help you get what you
want by ASKING.
Psychologists say that the one factor which motivates people to act-more
than any other-is their desire to be IMPORTANT. In fact, psychologists even go so
far as to say that everybody should have to wear across his chest a big sign printed
in capital letters reading, “I WANT TO FEEL IMPORTANT." This constant
reminder would greatly improve our relations with each other and would enable
us to get a lot more cooperation and avoid a lot of unnecessary friction!
When you ASK people to do something or to give you something or for some information you need, they
will have a strong tendency to do what you ASK because, by so doing, it demonstrates THEIR importance. It makes them feel superior to you and gives them that warm inner glow of
having been helpful.
At the same time you, too, have gained. You got what you ASKED for.
And, you, also have the inner satisfaction of having helped someone else feel important
and helpful.
On the negative side, the other person would lose his sense of
importance by refusing to do what you ASKED because it might indicate his
inability to do so. Or it would be rude, discourteous and probably antagonizing
for the other person to respond unfavorably by declining . what you ASKED if
your request were logical, courteous, friendly and appropriate. Most people
would not want to put themselves in that unpleasant position.
Perhaps a few people would, and you might as well get used to
meeting them in this imperfect world of ours.
Marcus Aurelius, one of the wisest men who ever ruled the Roman Empire,
wrote in his diary, "I am going to meet people today who talk too much,
people who are selfish, egotistical, ungrateful. But I won't be surprised or
disturbed, for I could not imagine a world without such people."
Yes, you, too, will meet people like that. You will meet people who
not only will refuse to do what you ASK, but they will not even civilly answer
your reasonable questions.
But don't let those few stubborn, neurotic people bother you. Joyfully
ignore them and get on your way to success. Remember that Success is like a
bicycle-when you stop pedaling (ASKING) you will fall!
Encourage others to talk by ASKING:
"What do you think should be done about ?" (This is an irresistible
conversation-starter!)
"What has been your experience in such a situation?" (
Avoid making contrary pronouncements. )
"What is your opinion?"
"How would you do it?"
As Will Rogers said, "There is still a lot of mon- key in us. Throw
anything you want into our cage and we will give it serious
consideration." That applies to ASKING questions or ASKING for favors. All
but a few abnormal people just can't ignore a logical, courteous request for ac-
tion or information. As Will Rogers said, "They will give it serious
consideration." It is a natural instinct-and also a "conditioned
response."
It is the scientific finding of psychologists that a favorable response
to ASKING is a “conditioned re- sponse" developed in everybody starting in
early child- hood, continued constantly during all the years of school- ing, and
established as the principal business procedure for getting things done.
That is WHY people will do what you ASK.
That is why the “magic" three-letter word- ASK-is the
qUickest, simplest, easiest, surest way for you to GET WHATEVER YOU WANT.
So let
us begin, in the next chapters, to explore some of the many "magic"
ways of ASKING which lead to the Land of Abundance!
